"I believe; help my unbelief!"
This quote from Mark 9:24 has come to mind a few times during my latest struggle to trust that God will provide a job for us, and, consequently, a future. Thankfully, even in our struggles--or maybe especially in our struggles--God is patient with us and compassionate towards us, for He "remembers we are dust."
My latest epiphany has to do with the story of the loaves and fishes. I just love it when God takes a story that I have heard countless times and breathes new life into it. I was listening to our pastor deliver a message from John 5: 19-24. In this passage Jesus points out that He does only what He sees the Father doing. The gist of the message was, Jesus is a revelation to the Father. If we want to know the Father, we must know the Son. The pastor encouraged us to dig into scripture and study the character of Jesus to see new things about the Father.
The pastor probably didn't mean for us to do that right then as he finished expounding upon the point. However, my eyes wandered over to the next chapter, which contained the story of the feeding of the five thousand. And, it was then that God made an old story new
When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, "Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?"He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.
Philip answered him, "Eight months' wages would not buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!"
Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter's brother, spoke up, "Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?"John 6:5-9
And so, I get a glimpse of my Father through the Son. He knows what He has in mind to do, but He also wants me to see that it has to be Him who does it. I am unable to orchestrate this miracle. I, like Phillip and Andrew, cannot fathom the answer to this need on my own. And, I have a feeling, also like Phillip and Andrew, that I will stand amazed when this "day" is done, staring incredulously at the bounty He has provided.
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